I’m slightly confused as to when suffering with a few
nerves before you’re about to do something starts to be diagnosed
as you suffering with anxiety.
And at what point does this become a problem.
I’ve always thought that a little bit of nerves / stress / anxiety controlled
in the right way can actually help you to do better than if you didn’t have it.
So when does the very normal ‘butterflies in the stomach’ become anxiety?
….and what’s the best way to deal with it?
How NOT to deal with it
I used to think that drinking would be a good way to handle nerves.
Off to a social gathering full of people that I don’t know – best get a few drinks down
first then. That’ll calm things down.
I’m amazed that I did this for so long. – years!!
Booze ain’t the answer though!
You see it’s an addictive MOFO and before you know it you’re drinking at every
opportunity – as you convince yourself that in order to bring your A game you need
a few drinks inside you first. (that’s what I used to do anyway)
Worse as got older
Since having kids and getting older, the issue seems to have been getting worse –
well certainly more frequent.
I constantly have this FEAR of failure.
Not just failure for me, but I take it personally if any of my clients
don’t get the results that they should have.
I take full responsibility.
It’s why I strive for perfection with the delivery of my offline and online
training programs.
Constantly looking at ways to improve.
I strive for 100% of all of our clients achieving their goals. Anything less pisses me off.
Even though there are always circumstances beyond our control.
2008 was bad
Back in 2008 (before I was even in the fitness industry) I was joint owner of
a financial services company that went out of business.
32 staff lost their jobs.
I tried to make out that it was just business and nothing could be done about it,
but deep down I felt responsible for letting people down.
Truth is the whole experience effected me just as much – I personally lost tens of
thousands of pounds.
I had no job.
No car!
We then had to move out of our family home and in with my in laws (while my wife
was pregnant with our daughter) – lived with them a whole year.
Eventually I started to get back on my feet and set up a new financial services company.
2012 was even worse
I then left this company that I set up as I had this burning desire to set up my own
fitness company.
I had huge debts though.
..and no income to service them.
I had gone from being a very well qualified guy in the financial services industry
with lots of experience and contacts to starting right at the bottom again in a brand
new industry.
People thought I was mad.
I must admit that I had serious doubts in those first few months. I then got really ill
through the stress of it all. In hospital at the beginning of 2013 for a week.
WHAT IF THIS FAILED!!
So many people hovering over me ready to say
“I Told You So”
It twisted my stomach in knots – in fact just writing this now and re-living those
days and my thought process has my stomach feeling funny.
If it was 12 months prior, alcohol would have been my way of dealing with everything.
…..and that would have got me no where.
This time
It was different.
This time.
I had
exercise.
Keeping fit.
Eating well.
Drinking well.
Staying focused on my goals.
Having new early morning daily habits.
All of this contributed to me getting and staying on track.
NOW?
I own 2 gyms.
One is a ladies only gym – my wife Alex now runs this one day to day.
The other is an Over 35’s Men’s Only gym offering both offline and online programs.
I’m working towards my main mission which is to positively impact over 100,000
men over 35 into getting and staying in shape.
I’m in better shape now than I was 20 years ago – honestly!!
I’ve been with my wife Alex for 20 years this year and our relationship is better than ever.
We have 2 amazing kids that I see all the time and play a huge role in inspiring them to
stay fit and healthy.
And I still suffer with anxiety!!
Yep.
I know. Given the way everything is right now I shouldn’t should I?
I’m not sure that this will ever go away though.
I accept this.
I’ve just become much better at handling it.
As soon as those early signs are there I take a step back and accept
what’s happening and then I try to identify why.
Then I’ll hit the gym.
Then I write down 3 things that I’m grateful for in that moment.
Then I write down where I’m heading and remind myself of my
mission and those that I’m trying to positively impact.
….and then that anxiety just seems to fade.
Does exercise and keeping fit really lead to this kind of dramatic change?
YES.
Because when you start enjoying exercise, and seeing results
you naturally want to keep it going. It then leads to you making better
decisions elsewhere as well – everything you eat and drink, how much
sleep you try and get etc. – as you want to keep getting fitter and
stronger.
Beats trying to handle it all by numbing the reality with a few
beers!
Ricky
PS: If you can relate to any of this and you’re currently out of shape
then I’d love to work with you for 6 weeks and help you go
through a similar transformation.
It’s pretty cool on the other side!
Just click below if you’d like the details: